Successfully managing new relationships takes some know-how and finesse. Once you have helpful information, you’ll be able to better handle all the ins and outs of a new relationship. When you’re involved in a new relationship, it stands to reason that you might not know your new friend very well.
One of your initial tasks is to try to learn as much as you can about them. You’ll eventually get to the other aspects of managing your new relationship, like listening well to whatever they are willing to share. Another task is letting the relationship grow and develop however it will. Also, speak honestly and carefully — yet avoid talking too in-depth about your prior relationships. As you can see, each of these steps will take time and patience on both sides.
Consider a newly-developing relationship as an experiment to determine whether the two of you would make a good couple. In order to come to a conclusion about a new relationship, it needs time and effort to flourish. In essence, once two people see they’re hitting it off, the next step is to find out more about each other. But in order to develop positive feelings about one another, it’s important to listen to each other. Try to pick up on your new friend’s interests, likes, and pet peeves.
Are they interested in playing the piano or writing music? Does he/or she love World War II history? What are your new friend’s likes and dislikes? Does he/ or she prefer Italian food over Mexican food? Maybe they are an avid baseball fan and never misses a game. Perhaps their pet peeve is whenever someone is late it frustrate them.
When you start a new relationship, you’re starting from square one. So it will take some time for each of you to really get to know each other. But getting to know the person is an integral first step. If you feel you’ve made it through the first stage of a new relationship: listening and getting to know one another, it’s time to sit back and allow the relationship to progress and blossom in its own way.
Probably the most critical aspect of managing a new relationship is ensuring the relationship is allowed to progress naturally. Depending on the two people involved, a relationship will unfold gradually at its own pace if it’s allowed to.
Spend those early days and weeks of the relationship having fun together, trying out the other person’s hobbies and interests, and generally hanging out together. Doing all these things will allow the relationship to develop at its own unique pace.
An expression of a person’s own insecurities is feeling compelled to “hurry up” and solidify a new relationship. Alas, this action can do great damage to an unfolding relationship as, unfortunately, the other person might not have the same agenda as you. When some people sense they’re being pushed in any way, they turn around and run.
This is a common error that people make early on in relationships — rushing to push the relationship forward so it becomes monogamous or more “serious” right away. Especially if one of you is pushing toward a quick commitment of this type, the relationship most likely will fizzle before it had any real chance of beginning.
Let go of the need to steer the relationship in the direction you want it to go. The other person will be more comfortable sticking around as long as he feels there’s no pressure to make the relationship go a certain way. Just spend time together enjoying each other’s company. Your connection will grow and develop naturally into something special if it’s meant to be. As the relationship gets better and more solid, there’s always a time when you can start talking about your old relationships with a prior person and they will most likely start to open up about their past hurtful experiences.
If you start talking about a former relationship that you still feel devastated by, you might reveal some of your own insecurities to the other person without even realizing it. And frankly, it may be too early in the developing relationship to be doing that. The listener might not yet be in a space emotionally to be understanding of what you went through and how it affected you. For these reasons, it’s best to refrain from sharing too much about a prior relationship early on in a new relationship.